Towards the end of last year I wrote about how I was sick of being fat. I still am. Fat, that is, and sick of it.
Now before I go any further I feel like I need to say that a persons body image does not bother me. If you’re what doctors and science considers to be overweight or obese, but you are comfortable and happy then by all means more power to you. This is about me and the way I feel about myself, and bottom line is that I’m not happy.
If you’re unhappy with your hair color, what do you do? You go to the salon and get a new color. Same thing here. If you’re unhappy with yourself in any way you should change it. Many of you could probably say I”m lazy and should be trying to lose the fat the good old fashioned way with diet and exercise. I promise you I’ve tried. I’ve worked, sweated, counted calories, and everything else. The only thing I haven’t done is take some sort of magic pill to make me not hungry or have more energy or what not. I’ve never wanted to put a chemical substance in my body.
So what gives? Why can’t I get down to my healthy (NOT skinny or ‘high school’ size) size? Well, I started doing research on body fat and learned there are three different types of fat. Two of them are essential in your body. One of them is abnormal, and wouldn’t you know the abnormal is the hardest to get rid of. In comes HCG. And, yes that’s that hormone that spikes as soon as us lovely momma’s conceive. What it does when it kicks in is protects your baby and your body. It makes sure that your body is providing everything your growing fetus needs without putting your body in harm. Well it’s the same thing only sans baby. You consume only 500 calories a day, and the HCG tells your body to fork over some of that abnormal fat to help continue to fuel your body while protecting your organs from not losing the fats that they need. That’s the cliffs notes version anyway. If you’re interested in learning more see the bottom of this post for a couple of the ebooks I read, or Google ‘HCG Diet’. And no I didn’t just hop on the quickest new fad that came into view, I really did spend a lot of time researching all of the info. And I do suggest that if any of my postings during this diet interests you, you first do the research for yourself.
It all made sense to me. And? I’m at that point where I need to take a big step. I’m tired of feeling depressed every single time I look inside of my closet. I want my confidence back. I want to feel good about myself again. I want to look in the mirror and love what I see again. And this? Is my journey through it to share with you. I’m not looking for a specific number when I step on the scale, more looking for a size difference in the clothes that I wear. I want the rolls of fat around my shoulder blades, waistline, arms, stomach, legs, and butt to be gone. I want these horrible measurements to get smaller.
Ready for a little dose of real? You’re supposed to weigh yourself everyday. So I weighed myself. (I can’t believe I’m actually about to share this) Measurements weren’t a requirement, but I took them anyway… those are written in lipstick on my mirror there.
Starting weight: 193lbs
So there it is. I’m ready to start this. I’m ready to love myself again.
***I’m writing this as I prepare for, and begin the HCG diet, however I’m not posting this in real time. These posts are going live after I’ve completed the first phase.
Originally written 3/07/2012